Why do you always need there to be something wrong with me?
Seriously, with some people (including me), the first thing out of their mouth after “hi” is always “What’s wrong?” When I have a problem, I usually work through it with God in about five minutes, though some things dig a little deeper and require more time than that. But I feel compelled to have a problem when someone asks, so I catch myself trying to make up something that’s wrong. “What a weirdo,” you might be saying, but I know you know exactly what I mean.
Some people need you to be messed up. They can clearly point out all your defects.
They need to focus on other people’s failures because they’re ultimately insecure about their own.
I think it makes them feel better about themselves and their own messed-up lives: “Hey, maybe I am not all bad because look at so and so.”
Consider others better than yourselves. Stop being critical out of the gate. No one wants to feel like you are constantly digging for what’s wrong with them. Listen to yourself. Ask yourself: Are you trying to find what’s wrong with others and why?
- Are you deflecting the attention from yourself to someone else so they can’t see what’s really going on with you?
- Are you trying to distract everyone from you because you have major issues?
- Are you a fixer and you need people to be messed up so you can put your nose in it and try to fix it?
- Are you constantly reading into texts, social media, and conversations with a critical eye, looking for something bad or negative, just one more thing to tear down in someone else?
Well, STOP IT!
It’s easy to pull out what’s wrong with people. It’s easy to talk about the news, sports, and other surface-level stuff. It’s easy to be CRITICAL. It’s easy to defend yourself. It’s easy to build walls. It’s easy to be NEGATIVE. It’s easy to hurt people with your words. It’s easy to be RUDE. It’s easy to hate your enemies. It’s easy to trample on weak people. It’s easy to look at others rather than inspecting yourself. It’s easy to be AVERAGE.
But we were never called to be average! NOPE! We are called to the plow—to work hard, to plant in times of drought. To plant what? LIFE!!! Isaac planted in a drought and reaped BLESSINGS!
Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold,
because the LORD blessed him. (Genesis 26:12 NIV)
It’s HARD to pull out what’s GOOD about people! It’s hard to find things to be thankful for!
We were never called to be lazy. We are called to do HARD THINGS!
Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! (Proverbs 6:6 NIV)
Find something good to say!
Find something good in everyone.
Stop complaining about their lives and their behaviors. If it bothers you that much, PRAY but don’t talk about it. Let go and let God.
You are not their Holy Spirit. Shhhh! Is there anything going on that you think God doesn’t already know about?
You are not their Savior. You aren’t their Jesus. You are never going to be. It’s God’s kindness that leads man to repentance and change, not your correction (believe me, I am preaching to the choir).
The world is negative enough. Zip your lips. Speak kindly to each other. Love each other—yes, even when it’s hard. You don’t have to point out everything that is wrong, so STOP IT!
You don’t have to make it all better!
You can actually allow some things to roll off your back, taking EVERY thought captive and making it obedient to Christ (see 2 Corinthians 10:5).
“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples,
if you love one another.” (John 13:35 NIV)
if you love one another.” (John 13:35 NIV)
Consider loving others. Consider speaking WELL of them. Consider speaking LIFE to them and encouraging them through text, phone, and social media and in person, even when they’ve done nothing to earn it.
I bet you think you are one of those people who do this already, right? Don’t be so arrogant about your ways! Take a second look. Deeply inspect yourself because I am confident we can all use improvement in this area.
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