Dear New Driver

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Dear New Driver,

As much as Disney and Pixar want you to think your car has a personality, I hate to tell you this, but it doesn’t. You can name it. You can put eyelashes on it. You can put a girdle in front of it or decorate it with a tail on the back. You can call it by a name all day long, but your car does not have a personality. I’m so sorry. I apologize from the bottom of my heart that you have a friend you think is real and legit; it’s not.

Let me tell you this: since your car does not have a personality, it takes on your character. When you hop in the car, if you are happy, your car will be happy. If you are sad, your vehicle is going to be sad. If you are angry, your car is going to be angry. It will be blasting through traffic, flying around people, thoroughly annoyed. If you are in a hurry, your car will be fast. It didn’t turn into a sports car overnight. It’s not a Camaro. But you put that pedal to the metal and press it down because you need to get somewhere on time.

Just because you’re a new driver who can drive does not mean you have to. When you are in a hurry or distracted, asking your parents to drive you where you need to go is okay. Tell them, “I’m in a really big hurry, and I don’t want my car to be in a hurry,” or “I’m very upset right now. I’m afraid I won’t be able to drive through my tears,” or “I won’t be able to drive without anger.”

If you recognize that your car takes on your personality, you can stop it. You can say, “It’s not okay to drive an angry car around town because that could hurt people.” There are consequences to driving your car when you are emotional. When your vehicle is angry, you can end up in a wreck by hitting another car or someone walking on the sidewalk. Wouldn’t that be awful? That is horrible. You would have to live with it.

We don’t want to do that. We want to ensure we realize our car does not have a personality—but it takes on ours.