Control-Freak Me

Pastor Craig is preaching on controlling things, people, etc. great subject. We all try to control things.

I’m also wondering about people who are stubborn & control themselves so much that they are not even teachable. I can’t learn anything from anyone else.

I use to be so proud like that. I couldn’t let myself receive from others or be taught by them because it shook my foundation – my value of who I thought I was. Maybe I am not as smart as I thought I was. I just needed people to think I did a good job. I needed people’s approval. No. I got this. I’m good.

I don’t need your input. Oh. I’ll pray about it because I don’t need you to see my blind spots. 

I did this because I just couldn’t take their comments because I was so insecure. Therefore, I wasn’t teachable. I was rude, defensive, quick to tell them how they were wrong about their perceptions of me.

I once defended the lie I believed to the death of me. I worshipped it. I was unwilling to let it loose allow while I didn’t even know I had this blind spot. 

Today, I am set free. 

Well, Mostly. 

You know what? It’s ok to fail. It’s ok to be wrong. 

I don’t defend myself as much. I’m quick to see where I mess up, I fail, I’m too harsh, etc (cause I do it a lot!). But I’m not insecure anymore. I want to be shaped by God.

I want to be made in His image more and more. I don’t want those awful traits hanging over me! I want them to be spotlighted. I am so teachable that I seek out teachers. I watch people and learn from them almost daily (good or bad). I learn from my kids. My husband is my mentor. (This is a whole ‘nother subject!)

I still have my areas that I try to control – my kitchen, the trash, my bedtime (and my husband’s bedtime), etc!

How are you controlling or protecting yourself (which is really controlling anyway)? Come on now – fess up! 
How are you controlling others? Let’s give it up and rest in the arms of God! 🙂  

God make me more teachable. Whatever it takes, I’m willing. Make me more like you Father. I love you God! You are Worthy! 

Check out Pastor Craig’s message at, Altar Ego, Week 2 

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